It\u2019s been a while since I have shared anything. Probably partly out of depression and also because I\u2019m having a hard time conveying the thoughts I\u2019m about to write. I\u2019ve been encouraged by many to put what I\u2019ve been writing in a booklet form. When I do, I may have to find a better way to say what I\u2019m about to say. Your feedback will be very helpful in that regard.<\/p>\r\n
After three times in the hospital, the last time for 25 days, I could see that the chances of Carol coming back to anything close to her normal life was very slight. The doctor was willing to continue treatment. He was gracious to let me know that whatever decision I make I\u2019d have to live with it the rest of my life, and therefore I must have peace in what I do. But the fact was that Carol was so weakened that she wasn\u2019t communicating in a meaningful way. We had started feeding her through a peg tube (a direct line into the stomach to provide nourishment) a few days before, but in my opinion, that should have been done two weeks earlier when there might have been the possibility of strengthening her. But now her body was not responding in a meaningful way.<\/p>\r\n
Frankly, two weeks before she had said to me, \u201cThat\u2019s enough, no more.\u201d I now realize that she was saying that she didn\u2019t want any more sustaining treatment.<\/p>\r\n
I made the hard decision to ask the doctor to make provision for me to bring her home under hospice. When we brought Carol home from the hospital, I was still suffering from the shock of the fact that I was bringing her home to die.<\/p>\r\n
It was obvious very quickly that pneumonia was setting back into her lungs. More antibiotics would only delay the inevitable. For the first several days, I was still feeding her through the peg tube. The thought of withdrawing food from her seemed inhumane. In my mind that would mean I was starving her to death. You would think by this time in my life, I would have understood that biologically that is not what I would be doing. It\u2019s not like when you and I haven\u2019t eaten for six hours and we feel we have to eat something because as we say, \u2028\u201cwe are starving.” No, in her state, her body was trying to shut down.<\/p>\r\n
I believe the Lord gave me an insight that I hope will be helpful to others who find themselves in this same position. I heard the Lord say (in my spirit, not audible), \u201cWhy aren\u2019t you cooperating with me. I\u2019m trying to bring my little girl home and you are sustaining her body and delaying my work.\u201d (Now, I know that the sovereign God could have taken Carol home anytime without my help. And He could have taken Carol home even though I might be interfering. But God has chosen many time to do His will in conjunction with our cooperation.)<\/p>\r\n
God then said, \u201cThis modern medicine is good when it allows people to live longer, but it is bad when it prevents people for dying when it\u2019s their time. In the old days, people were allowed to fall asleep in the Lord. And that\u2019s what I want for Carol.\u201d<\/p>\r\n
I withdrew the nourishment with full assurance that what I was doing was actually the humane thing to do. This was hard, but it was right. It didn\u2019t feel right then and it doesn\u2019t feel right now, but I know it was the right thing to do.<\/p>\r\n
I\u2019m not saying that others in this situation should follow my decision. I\u2019m just telling you what I did and why. Everything about it comes back at times to distress me, to disturb my thinking and to challenge my actions. But deep in my soul, I can live with my decisions.<\/p>\r\n
It is my prayer that the thought of \u201ccooperating with God\u201d can help some who are in the situation I was in. If it does, then I have accomplished the intent of this writing.<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
From The Heart Of Ken Shiplet It\u2019s been a while since I have shared anything. Probably partly out of depression and also because I\u2019m having a hard time conveying the thoughts I\u2019m about to write. I\u2019ve been encouraged by many to put what I\u2019ve been writing in a booklet form. When I do, I may […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":28,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false},"categories":[148],"tags":[],"acf":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/southsidealive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4596"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/southsidealive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/southsidealive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/southsidealive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/28"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/southsidealive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4596"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/southsidealive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4596\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4700,"href":"https:\/\/southsidealive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4596\/revisions\/4700"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/southsidealive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4596"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/southsidealive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4596"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/southsidealive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4596"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}